GOOD NEWS BAD NEWS

GOOD NEWS:

Smoking pot is now legal in Washington, D.C.

BAD NEWS:

Republicans won't be SMOKING IT.

*

GOOD NEWS:

Mitt Romney will not run in the 2016 Presidential election.

BAD NEWS:

Rick Perry is and Sarah Palin might be.

*

GOOD NEWS:

Speaker of the House of Representatives John Boehner said that everything he knows he learned inside a bar.

BAD NEWS:

Representative Boehner is still inside a bar.

*

GOOD NEWS:

Madonna continued to perform at the Brit Awards after she fell off the stage.

BAD NEWS:

She suffered whiplash, and she still isn't a virgin.

*

GOOD NEWS:

The Buff Orpington hen named Ping Pong layed a perfectly spherical egg.

BAD NEWS:

We still don't know which came first: The chicken or the egg?

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GOOD NEWS:

dONALD TRUMP STILL WEARS

THAT ORANGE THING ON HIS

HEAD.

BAD NEWS:

dONALD TRUMP IS STILL AN

IDIOT:

"This very expensive 

GLOBAL

WARMING bullshit has got

to stop. Our planet is

freezing, record 

low temps, 

and our GW scientists are

stuck in ice."

Donald Trump

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES!